Monday, August 9, 2010

'Manifesto'

Sunday's ride was a long one...115 miles. The ride was nowhere near as hard as the 101 miler the week before (Culpeper) but just the sheer distance is overwhelming. We did two loops. 65 miles and 50 miles. The 65 miler was tough but I finished in a tad under 5 hours. There were NOOOO bathrooms the entire way and I think I had to pee for like 55 miles of the entire ride. As soon as I took a pit stop at a gas station towards the end, the 50 miler didn't seem too bad. The second loop was much easier than the first. I think I did the first 25 miles in an one hour and 50 minutes which was AWESOME. I was flying (well felt like I was). The last half was not so great. The heat and wind were getting to me but I pushed through and finished.

At about mile 76, I started crying....what a shocker I know...but this time it was different.

By mile 76, I had been in my own head for almost 6 hours. Once I had gotten through the 'to do' list, 'goals' list, 'crap I forgot to _____' list, I got to, 'thoughts on the last year'. This weekend was the culmination of a year of training so it was actually a good time for that last list to pop up.

First on the list..."Why I signed up for Ironman"
I thought about the dark place I was in when I signed up for Ironman. I had gained a lot of weight, my ex had just broken up with me, I felt like my dreams for my career were going nowhere, I hated DC, I did not like my job, and physically, I just felt like I wasn't capable of doing anything. Above it all, I missed my family terribly and hated being so far away. I think I hated everything at that point. It was horrible.

Second on the list..."How I feel now"

I can't say it was all solved because of Ironman, but I thought about all I've accomplished. I was at mile 76 of a ride and I wasn't in pain...I wasn't exhausted. It feels so good to feel alive and one with my body (as cheesy as that may sound). Being active has always been meditative for me and I finally had that feeling again. It was amazing. I was crying and smiling as I kept pedaling forward. I've lost almost 15 lbs, I have a renewed sense of optimism with my career (and future goals), and while I still miss my family, I know one day I'll be able to be close to them again. And DC, well I've started to love it again especially since I know so many amazing people in the area.

Third on the list..."The amazing person I've met"

That's right! During the last year, I met someone I am absolutely in love with. Beautiful. Kind. Forgiving. A good friend. Intelligent. A work in progress...but hey who isn't? That person is...me.

I think that's why I was really crying. Because I've finally accepted myself for who I am and can finally see what my friends and family see. I believe in myself as much as they do....And I could not have gotten to this point without them. So thank you. Thank you for saying 'I belive in you', 'I'm proud of you', and of course, my motto for the year, 'HTFU!'.

Thank you for being such wonderful people and being part of my entire Ironman experience.

I don't know if I'll make the time cutoff. It's not really something I can worry about on race day bc I have no control over it. However, I can leave it all on the course and do whatever I need to do to make the cutoff. I will have no regrets either way.

Okay enough. Stop making me cry! :-)

Next up. I should probably sign up for Luray Sprint on Sunday..... :-)

Rohini

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

P.S.

This morning.

1 hr 20 minute swim: 2900 yds (1.65 miles)

Just going with the flow

Warning: it's a long post because I have a lot of notes that I need to keep track of. :-)


So last week was pretty stellar...I came back from a wedding and something just clicked with swimming:

Tuesday - 1950 yds/55 minutes
Thursday - 2100 yds/55 minutes

I only did one bike ride last week - on Thursday - because of mechanical issues (I had to get a new tire and apparently my chain was stretched which explains a lot - my chain got stuck the week before when I was on the Crit and I fell over not once but twice). While it wasn't much at all, 3 loops at Hains Point, it felt pretty good and I could really feel a difference in my bike! I still need to get the handle bars wrapped again but I'll do that after the long ride this upcoming weekend so she's all shiny and new for Ironman!

Moving on to Saturday's long ride. A lot of this is boring nutrition stuff but I need to document it so I can keep it in mind for race day.

I'd been having stomach issues the entire week and it was hard to eat enough food so I was a little nervous that I didn't get enough calories in on a daily basis to support the approximately 9 hour ride I was going to attempt the next day. I went to bed at 6:00 PM on Friday night. I know it was a little overkill but I needed the sleep so badly so I popped a Unisom and off to bed I went. Got out of bed around 4 AM.

Pre-ride Nutrition: I had an Almond Butter sandwich on the drive there and a bottle of gatorade. Right before I left I had a bowl of cereal. I think the calories were just right. (Probably around 400-500).

First loop. 16 miles (Culpeper Triathlon course). It felt pretty good. I passed a couple people, people passed me. It was just a warm up loop and then towards the end I actually kept up with people I know are faster than me without feeling like I was going too hard. So I was feeling pretty pumped. I didn't think the hills were too bad except that first hill right when we rolled out of the parking lot. It was tough mainly because I wasn't warmed up yet. Took a couple wrong turns but nothing too bad.

Next, the Old Rag/Culpeper ride. Susan G. sent us an elevation chart that looked like this:


73 miles. 6370 feet of climbing.

I basically said 'shit' and cried myself to sleep. Jk. :-) I was excited for the challenge.








Madison elevation chart.
















Total climbing: I can't seem to find it anywhere....but I know it's less than Culpeper.

The Culpeper ride was....exhausting, hard, but I did it. Now I'm not gonna lie, some tears came out at one point (Mile 74ish of the entire day) and I thought I wouldn't make it. Ed had just passed me so I got him to come back and he talked me out of quitting by pouring ice water on me and giving me coke and chocolate.

I finished. That's what I was happy about. That even with thoughts of quitting, I pushed through with Jodie and we came in together.

Then we went out and did another 10 miles. :-) For me, that was a total of 101 miles. The longest ride I've ever done.

Nutrition: Almond Butter & Jelly (changing this to PB & J) every 15 minutes every other hour; shot blocks on the even hours; gatorade throughout; Cheetos at rest stops; and coke for the final 2 hours. I tried pretzels but they just taste gross to me while riding.

Things I need to put into my special needs bag:

Coke, Cheetos, Chocolate (mmm Snickers bars!), extra PB&J

Today I'm going to order the PowerBar perform and see how that works out for me because it'll be on the course. This will really save me from having to mix my own gatorade.

Next up. 120 miles on Sunday. Keep your fingers crossed for me! :-)

Rohini

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Two things that are awesome about today

1. Size 8 pants. woot.

2. 1950 yards in 55 minutes last night and I didn't feel too tired. :-) Best swim I've had in a LONG time.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Optimistic

So I got yelled at by a certain woman...ahem Es...to HTFU after my last post. I decided to post some positive things about training and the last few weeks.

A. I've lost a total of 13 pounds. Holy crap. :-) Another 3.6 to go and I'll be at my goal weight for Ironman :-)

B. I took a small hiatus from training over the last week due to Nazia's wedding and it really helped put things in perspective a little bit. I think I just needed to get away from everything for a little while and be completely engrossed in a different world. While I didn't have an huge revelations about training or myself, I think it just quieted the doubt in my mind a bit.

C. I have absolutely the most amazing support system. Between my friends and Team Z and my family, I could not ask for anything more. Some friends do give me a little crap about not being able to do things, but I know at the end of the day they understand how important it is to me to get across the finish line.


On my plate for this week: It's recovery week (yay!) so I have low key workouts. Need to get a new tire for my rear wheel because I keep getting flats...boo!...I get to swim with Meg, bike with Jacquie, and Sat is 110 miles on my bike! Including Saturday, only three more extremely long rides (110, 120, 80) and then it's taper time. Holy crap.

As Cat told me: 1) Just keep my head down and keep swimming 2) Just keep pedalin 3) Just keep putting one foot in front of the other.

Laters,
Ro - getting it done - hini

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

When it comes to Ironman training...

...I'm the fat kid at recess who doesn't ever get picked to be on someone's soccer team because they suck.

(side note. I'm not saying I'm actually fat, just saying that I kind of suck at all things triathlon...except for transitions which are my FAVORITE)

The 100 miler on Sunday was not so good. I did the first 62 miles in about 4.5 hours. I started at 5:45 AM and rolled in around 10:15 or so. When I rolled in, I threw up. Which was awesome. The heat got to me, the nutrition I switched to (perpetuem and gu) was not working. Jacquie came out to ride the second loop of 42 with me so I cooled down a bit, got some electrolytes and carbs in my body, and went back out with probably the most amazing cheerleader and riding mate ever.

Now, I'd like to point out, yet again, that I'm a pretty positive person. My friends come to me for advice, to feel better, to vent, to talk, etc. But every time I get on my bike, I have a breakdown. EVERY SINGLE F-ING TIME. Jacquie says I just need some cheetos which could be the case because at Mile 72, I stopped and sat under a tree while awesome saggers Mary and Roy gave me coke and cheetos. After that, I picked up the speed. Still had to stop once to cool down again, but I felt like I was going a lot faster. Granted I had a certain lady behind me 'yelling' at me (thanks J :) ). I got to mile 85 and called it quits.

In talking to Jacquie post ride and having a couple of days to think about it, I'm not pushing myself hard enough on the hills. I coast when I'm tired which is not good and doesn't bode well for IM Moo.

I'm really losing sight of why I signed up for this race. Training isn't fun anymore. I'm a huge mess emotionally and mentally I can't seem to get past the block I have on the bike. All I keep envisioning is being pulled from the race course and it just really sucks. I can't sleep at night because of that constant thought. Maybe I'm just not meant to do this. And even above that, I don't even think I'm capable of it at this point.

Ro

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Musselman - Half Ironman

I’m a Half-Ironman!....sort of

Race: Musselman
Location: Geneva, NY
Time: 8:16:52 (Cutoff – 8:00:00)

I hadn’t slept for days by the time we drove into Geneva, NY on Friday evening. The only thing I had done properly was eat. I went to see Becky a week and a half prior and we discussed my ‘bonking out’ during the longer rides. In conclusion, I was eating about 500 calories less a day than I should have been during the week. I was feeling pretty good about nutrition because my long run/ride the weekend before went MUCH better after eating more during the week and I was maintaining nutrition (even with the 100 degree weather) during the workouts as well. I had a goal…to finish. But I also had a secondary goal…to finish somewhere in 7.5 – 7.75 hours. This would give me a good gauge on whether or not I could complete Ironman within the allotted time (double the time and add an hour).

Morning: I got about 6.5 hours of decent sleep which is a lot considering it was raceday eve. Ate a piece of bread with almond butter before I left. I had everything ready to go and Kerry B. and I got to the race site around 5 AM. Set up was smooth. I didn’t forget anything and had it all ready to go around 6:15. I saw Mary and Tina. :-) Big hug and I'm ready to go!
6:30 AM – Gatorade + banana
6:45 AM – Wetsuit is finally on
6:50 AM – They’re corralling the athletes…and I’m about to puke in the grass.
6:55 AM – I’m with the pink swimcap ladies and I see so many Team Zers. We all gave each other high fives, hugs, words of encouragement, etc. We can do this….still about to puke in the grass.
6:59 AM – Es says ‘Count your first 30 strokes…best advice Ed ever gave me’
7:00 AM – First Wave
7:03 AM – Second Wave…we start wading into the water.
7:06 AM – And we’re off.

Swim: 51:51

Here’s the actual course.


















Here’s the course I took. :)


I was hoping for 45:00 or less but I’m just glad I didn’t freak out. I counted my first 30 strokes, and every 100 after that. I kept counting. It was the only way I could get through it and keep calm. The water was clear and VERY shallow but they said if we stood up, our feet would get cut up by the Mussels at the bottom (hence the name of the race…Musselman) so I made sure to keep kicking no matter what. Got pushed back into the group quite a few times by kayakers because I was off course (see red line).

Things to work on: Staying straight! And pushing myself a little harder. I can swim decently so I should go a little bit faster to save time during Ironman.

T1: 3:34

Hey! I wasn’t last in at least one category! YAY! :-) Felt good coming out of the water. Walked to bring my heart rate down. Calmly got my wetsuit off, bike stuff on, drank some EFS, got on the bike. And I’m off. Hammer gel in the first minute. And I see Ed, Mary, and Jacquie as I roll out of the park.

Bike: 4:02:14

For the first time, the bike felt good for most of the ride. I kept looking at my garmin and was shocked at my lightning speed of 16-18 mph going uphill considering to this point, my average pace has been 12 mph for most of the rides. Z2 TRAINING WORKS! I was getting passed by a lot of people but I was passing a few here and there. At one point, I passed a 21 year old guy and was very pleased with myself. We went back and forth the entire race. I passed him on the uphills, he passed me on the flats. I stopped to stretch my hip out which started bothering me around mile 40 while he passed me. I got back on, passed him going uphill and he screamed “and she’s back!” Me: “I’m an old woman compared to you…had to stretch my hip out”. We both had a good laugh and kept going. Around mile 50, I got stung in the face by a bee and holy crap did that hurt for a few minutes. I had to stop and happened to come across a few cars parked at an intersection…oh hey, they’re the 21 year old’s family (his name is Gio in case you’re interested)! I’m guessing it was his father who looked at my face, made sure the stinger wasn’t in the spot where I got stung, and off I went. Gio had stopped too. He wasn’t looking to good and I think he got sick. But he sped by me and I never caught up with him. So I was happy for him when I saw in the results that he got to the finish line.

All I could think of was Jacquie telling me to HTFU during the last few miles. So I did. Last 6 miles were a little rough, but nothing undoable. And I finished 20 minutes before I thought I would.

Nutrition went perfectly. No stomach issues. 1 bottle of EFS/hour, 1 swig of EFS gel at the 45 minute mark of each our for a total of 300 calories/hour. Drank almost 4 bottles during my time out there. I saw so many Zers on the ride and it felt good to see some familiar faces (shout out to Emily and Tracey who looked great out there).

T2: 4:35 (not last AGAIN! I like transitions)

Biking shoes were off as soon as I got to transition so I could run to my spot and get my running gear. I initially forgot my race belt and yelled “SHIT” really loudly which I did not mean to be rude. Other racers just laughed a bit. Just a little upset with myself bc I had to back to my spot, grab it, and then run out of transition. I ran out of transition and heard a HUGE "GO ROHINI" from Mary (I think).

Run: 3:14:38

It felt AMAZING to be off that bike. I ran the first 3.5 miles without stopping except at the stops to get some ice and water. I was SO thirsty. I think I drank too much water because after those first few stops, my stomach started feeling a bit weird. It felt almost distended, like I had entirely too much in it and I was starting to feel heavy. The first 3.5 miles were really great actually bc I got to see racers coming the other way. Yes, I was a bit envious at their amazing abilities to finish the distance so fast, but I got to cheer my friends on as they passed by me. I saw Sue which definitely made me go a little harder for a little while (until I got tired). She has so much faith in me, probably more than I have in myself and she looked great out there. Still running strong even towards the end of the race. I couldn’t be more cheesy when I say she’s definitely one of my role models on the team. :D

(It was also in the first 3.5 miles that I spoke with Amy. Amy had two flats during the bike and all I could say is keep going. One foot in front of the other and you'll get there. She was so upset and doubting herself, but she had trained hard for that day. So proud of her for getting through the tough points and finishing up the Half-Ironman!)
First obstacle. That damn hill. I roll up to it and a volunteer tells me I can choose the hill or the staircase. “Which is the lesser of two evils I ask” and she says probably the grass. So up I go. At the top, two volunteers are yelling “ YOU NEVER KNOW UNLESS YOU TRI”. Damn straight. So I ran up it. At the top Meagan and Talia came speeding by and gave me high fives. Off I went. More Ice and Water and Gu. My stomach is really not feeling good at this point.

I kept going, and started running the downhills, walking the uphills. There were SO many of them. Up and down. Up and Down. I asked myself why did I sign up for this? But surprisingly it wasn’t my legs that were the problem. It was my stomach. Then the gravel road came. 1.5 miles of gravel and two big (at the time) hills. Had to walk a lot of it. Got some ice, portajohn stop. I lost almost 10 minutes. At this point I had 4.5 miles left and under an hour to do it in order to make the cut off. I ran, Z4, sped down the hills and walked up as quickly as I could. I knew I wouldn’t make it but I wanted to finish as quickly as I could after. And I thought just maybe, I had a few 9 minute miles in me (not likely but hey, here’s to dreaming). I passed a woman who was probably around 80 spraying us down with her hose. She asked me if I was last and I said nope, think there are a few people behind me. “DOES THIS THING EVER END??”.”I don’t think so ma’am”. I just laughed it off and kept running.

Get through the tunnel and a volunteer walks TO me with water and ice. I had a mental breakdown at this moment. I knew I was getting in after the 8 hour cutoff and felt like a failure. But I had to get to the finish no matter what. Get the miles in. So I kept walking after she gave me some words of encouragement. Ran. Walked. Ran. Walked. It was embarrassing in my head, to still be out there while athletes were coming by me on their bikes with their gear and telling me I could do it. I was counting again. To 100. 100 counts running, 50 walking. Repeat. I ran the last .5 mile and booked it when I saw the Team Z tents. I started crying but for two reason. 1. Everyone stayed. Ed jumped out to hug me. And even though I didn’t come in the official cutoff time, I finished the distance. 2. I didn’t make the 8 hours and felt like I didn’t deserve the medal. I even asked Meagan if I should take it even though I didn’t finish. Her and Melody came up to me and hugged me as soon as I crossed the finish line. Thank you for talking me out of my mental state at the time. I don’t think I’ve ever been so happy AND unhappy to finish a race at the same time.

Two days later, I still feel like I can’t call myself a Half-Ironman because the official race cutoff time was 8 hours. I’m just praying that come September, that 17 hours time limit is enough.

Thank you to Team Z. Thank you to the most amazing course volunteers ever. Thank you to Coach Ed. Thank you all for having faith in me that I really can't seem to build up for myself.

Here’s to working even harder for the next 2 months.

P.S. I AM proud of myself for finishing regardless of the 8 hour time limit. :-) I pushed through the pain and the mental break. I did it.